Love Hurt by Evette Harvey

Love Hurts:

A Story of Teenage Abuse

Abuse doesn't exclusively happen in adulthood. Statistics show that one in three teenagers has experienced violence in a dating relationship. Not all abuse, though, is physical abuse. What is equally as destructive, yet is less talked about, is mental and emotional abuse. One in five or 20 percent of dating couples report some type of violence in their relationship. This includes mental and emotional abuse.

I met him when I was seventeen. I had just experienced a traumatic time in my life. My stepmother, who was my best friend, had passed away a couple months before. I was extremely depressed and in desperate need of love and attention. Then he showed up. He wasn't extremely good looking, or rich, but he made me feel good about myself. I see now that he played into my vulnerabilities. He told me I was gorgeous, something I had never been told by another guy, and what seventeen year old girl doesn't want to hear that she is gorgeous? He gave me a necklace, a gesture that only dragged me in deeper. At first, I thought things were perfect. I thought HE was perfect. Then it all started to go downhill.

Homecoming Week is when it all started. I was a senior in high school, so Homecoming week was a big week for my friends and me. We had the Powder Puff football game, the pep rally, and the big Homecoming game. I was extremely excited, and I was telling my boyfriend about all the plans I had made with my friends. He got extremely angry and started to yell at me. "What about me? What about US? When are you going to spend time with ME?" I started to shake; I had never seen him this angry before, and I was confused at his anger. Since we had begun dating, he insisted I spend practically all my time with him. I was starting to blow my friends off, and they were starting to get angry with my lack of availability. I agreed to go over to his place immediately after the Homecoming game ended. At first, he was adamant that I skip the game entirely, but after I cried and begged him, he "allowed" me to go. This is one recognizable sign of mental and emotional abuse, when the partner attempts to control different aspects of your life, like where you go and who you talk to.