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10 Tips to Mend a Broken Heart

 
Bess Myerson once wrote that “to fall in love is awfully simple, but to fall out of love is simply awful.” Especially if you are the one who wanted the relationship to last.  Mending a broken heart is never easy.

To stop loving isn’t an option. Author Henri Nouwen writes, “When those you love deeply reject you, leave you, or die, your heart will be broken. But that should not hold you back from loving deeply. The pain that comes from deep love makes your love ever more fruitful.”

But how do we get beyond the pain? Here are 10 tips :

1. Go through it, not around it.

I realize the most difficult task for a person with a broken heart is to stand still and feel the crack. But that is exactly what she must do. Because no shortcut is without its share of obstructions. Here’s a simple fact: You have to grieve in order to move on. During the 18 months of my severe depression, my therapist repeated almost every visit: “Go through it. Not around it.” Because if I went around some of the issues that were tearing me apart inside, then I would bump into them somewhere down the line, just like being caught in the center of a traffic circle. By going through the intense pain, I eventually surfaced as a stronger person ready to tackle problems head on. Soon the pain lost its stronghold over me.

 2. Detach and revel in your independence again.

Attempting to fill the void yourself — without rushing to a new relationship or trying desperately to win your lover back — is essentially what detaching is all about. The Buddha taught that attachment that leads to suffering. So the most direct path to happiness and peace is detachment.

“Great Monk, let me ask you: How can I attain liberation?” The Great Monk replied: “Who tied you up?” This old gardener answered: “Nobody tied me up.” The Great Monk said: “Then why do you seek liberation?”

One of the most liberating thoughts I repeat to myself when I’m immersed in grief and sadness is this: I don’t need anyone or anything to make me happy. When I’m experiencing the intense pangs of grief, it is so difficult to trust that I can be whole without that person in my life.  It is my job to fill the emptiness, and I can do it… creatively, and with the help of my higher power.

3. List your strengths....

47 Comments

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

9 months ago

Thanks Aimen to visit and comment.

8 months ago

:) THANJS TO VISIT LIKE CAT AND COMMENT

9 months ago

yessssssssssss...............veryn good post.......

7 months ago

THANKS MAXIMINA I DIT IT AND WORKS

6 months ago

thanks to visit, like and comment... I appreciate it/have a success bogging!

6 months ago

wow nice post ! Thanks :)

6 months ago

thanks Lady Hope never you have to try it:)

6 months ago

Thanks for the tips Maria.....!

6 months ago

thanks Cornel Appreciate your visit

6 months ago

Move on. When you feel you are ready to open your heart again, find someone else to be with.
Smile! Seriously, smiling makes you feel better and if you gather a few good, close friends and have a laugh together, you'll remember how good life was without him/her and that you're okay really.... :) I really love this Post ! :)

6 months ago

:) :) :) good very very nice comment thanks dear for that unique comment love it!!!!

6 months ago

Great post, so well done :)

6 months ago

thanks Cath

6 months ago

thanks Catharina its true its work!!!

6 months ago

that was so well elaborated. pains and heartaches are healed at the right time. and before you knew it, you begin to entertain a new one in your life. thanks for this post, i really love it.

6 months ago

loresa thanks to visit and comment your comment is very nice, unique and I appreciate it.

6 months ago

Hi Maria
Excellent post! I am happy to see that crying has a benefit as well. Is so true. I did that test on my own. After a good cry i fel much better and my mind more clear.
Unbelievable but real.
Working out very true.
Helping someone very true. Why? Your focus is on helping aomeone not on your broken heart.
Excellent article. The title is catchy.

6 months ago

THANKS DEAR NICO ..YOUR COMMENTS IS SO AWESOME AND IS VERY SWEET // A LOT OF PEOPLE NEEDS TO KNOW HOW TO MEND A SOUL OR BROKEN HEART. THANKS TO VISIT AND POST THIS VERY UNIQUE COMMENT.

6 months ago

nice information.

6 months ago

THANKS TO VISIT AND COMMENT... YOUR VISIT IS VERY WELCOME AND APPRECIATE

6 months ago

THANKS DEAR NICO ..YOUR COMMENTS IS SO AWESOME AND IS VERY SWEET // A LOT OF PEOPLE NEEDS TO KNOW HOW TO MEND A SOUL OR BROKEN HEART. THANKS TO VISIT AND POST THIS VERY UNIQUE COMMENT.

6 months ago

Nice post. Its a helpful reminder, thanks...

6 months ago

thanks to visit my blog and comment Appreciate it.

6 months ago

age is beauty 20y

6 months ago

sure age ia beauty I think all ages are beauty but in different ways thanks to visit and comment i appreciate your visit. WELCOME!!!

6 months ago

thank you, excellent post

6 months ago

DEAR RICHARD THANKS TO VISIT MY POST. LIKE AND COMMENT
ღ* ღ *)¸.♥´¸.♥´¨) ¸.♥*¨)ITS VERY APPRECIATEღ* ღ *)¸.♥´¸.♥´¨) ¸.♥*¨)

6 months ago

Nice post, thanks for sharing.

6 months ago

Thanks (¯d ღ * .ღ Dear Friend AYU“' ღ * .ღ *)to come to visit my blogs. I really appreciate.

6 months ago

sweet

6 months ago

DEAR Saeed THANKS TO VISIT MY POST. AND COMMENT
ღ* ღ *)¸.♥´¸.♥´¨) ¸.♥*¨)ITS VERY APPRECIATEღ* ღ *)¸.♥´¸.♥´¨) ¸.♥*¨)

6 months ago

we must be Ihave to be

5 months ago

THAT'S TRUE MY DEAR FRIEND...BUT I THAT'S TIPS REALLY WORK

5 months ago

losing a love one is really hard

5 months ago

Mending a broken heart is difficult but it is important to let heal. The determined will and the right attitude will do it. Great post.

5 months ago

Hi Maria,
Just a lovely post. The title is very inviting.
Broken heart. We should look for your tips. I like that number 4, 3, 9.
They all tips to consider.
_____________________________________
Be sure i will rate this post 5*CAD
Your FanBox Family&Friend, Nico

5 months ago

Hi Nico dear FB family &Friend.. your visit is very aprecatte and you lolvely comment is that""""very lovely"""" :) thanks Nico and About 4 years ago i had to practice that and IT'S WORKED VERY WELL...

5 months ago

Hello Maria, everyone experiences having a broken heart, your post will be a big help to everyone!

4 months ago

Excellent post, sometimes we need to cry to feel better, thank you for sharing these wonderful tips !!!

2 months ago