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Sweetie Friend helps education for the disabled.

 

How to Gain Control of Your Emotions

Controlling your emotions doesn't mean ignoring them. It means you recognize them and act on them when you deem it appropriate, not randomly and uncontrollably.

 

Steps

On the Spot

 

  • Know your emotions. There are a million different ways you can feel, but scientists have classified human emotions into a few basics that everyone can recognize: joy, acceptance, fear, surprise, sadness, disgust, anger, and anticipation. Jealousy, for example, is a manifestation of fear - fear that you're not "as good" as something else, fear of being abandoned because you're not "perfect" or "the best".

  • Recognize that emotions don't just appear mysteriously out of nowhere. Many times, we're at the mercy of our emotions on a subconscious level. By recognizing your emotions on a conscious level, you're better able to control them. It's also good to recognize an emotion from the moment it materializes, as opposed to letting it build up and intensify. The last thing you want to do is ignore or repress your feelings, because if you're reading this, you probably know that when you do that, they tend to get worse and erupt later. Ask yourself throughout the day: "How am I feeling right now?" If you can, keep a journal.

  • Notice what was going through your mind when the emotion appeared. Stop and analyze what you were thinking about, until you find what thought was causing that emotion. Your boss may not have made eye contact with you at lunch, for example; and without even being aware of it, the thought may have been in the back of your mind, "He's getting ready to fire me!"

  • Write down the evidence which supports the thought that produced the emotion or against that thought. When you begin to think about it, you might realize that since nobody gets along well with this particular boss, he can't afford to actually fire anyone, because the department is too short-staffed. For example, you may have let slip something that you should not have said which angered him, but which it is too late to retract.

  • Ask yourself, "What is another way to look at the situation that is more rational and more balanced than the way I was looking at it before?" Taking this new evidence into account, you may conclude that your job is safe, regardless of your boss's petty annoyances, and you're relieved of the emotion that was troubling you. If this doesn't work, however, continue to the next step.

  • Consider your options. Now that you know what emotion you're dealing with, think of at least two different ways you can respond. Your emotions control you when you assume there's only one way to react, but you always have a choice. For example, if someone insults you, and you experience anger, your immediate response might be to insult them back. But no matter what the emotion, there are always at least two alternatives, and you can probably think of more:

  •                       Don't react. Do nothing.

  •                       Do the opposite of what you would normally do.

  • Make a choice. When deciding what to do,

65 Comments

Great content.

21 months ago

Thank You Borhan !

21 months ago

Nice post, at times we need to check ourselves.

21 months ago

Yes Its true emotion can affect whole aspect your life, don't decide when your emotion is on high, decide after your emotion subside, be positive and relevant, emetion is normal but too much will drive you crazy, stop being too emotional and reverse the things that makes your emotion.

21 months ago

this is great ideas.

21 months ago

Hey SHi...Can i add up those points ...those are all good ones ?!

21 months ago

You are right in all the points you have mentioned above we have to know how to control our emotions especially the negatives ones. I think any one has a problem and it has a negative emotions reflects on your behaviors, so we have to get out from the effects of these negative emotions for example we can travel anywhere, we can get out of circle of the problem to look at it from outside to see the real size of it and then we can solve it and know how to have a positive emotions and of course reflects on our behaviour. Our God gives us the grace of forgetting, we can forget, may be it will take some time but it is really a grace we have to know how to use to have a positive emotions.


21 months ago

nice post

20 months ago

Nice post, at times we need to check ourselves.

20 months ago

informative. read my stuff for a laugh.

20 months ago

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20 months ago

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20 months ago

GOOD AND NICE POST

20 months ago

very good . you very well.
nice blog

20 months ago

In this age of global over-commercialization and competition for consumption, these advice should help us a lot. Besides, RELAXATION TECHNIQUES like Breathing and PMR (Progressive Muscle Relaxation) and others are really effective. Thanks.

20 months ago

nice post...

19 months ago

very nice post

19 months ago

thats amazing post... keep it up.. well done!

18 months ago

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mustak yildirim - 1 month ago

MUSTAK YILDIRIM askim canim arkadasim seni adana da beklerim cok güzel günler gecirisin gel beraber gezeriz atresim / toros mah 78096 sok h.e.yunus delibalta stesi c blok no 22 cukurova / ADANA TÜRKEY TLF 05352092376 maxsim0101@hotmail.com

18 months ago

VERY NICE

18 months ago

nice post

18 months ago

nice post

17 months ago

nice fact

17 months ago

nice

17 months ago

Ideas affect our outcome

17 months ago

great one

17 months ago

NICE ONE

17 months ago

nice

16 months ago

wonderful post

16 months ago

•*´` `*•.¸EXCIELENT.•*´` `*•.¸@ @¸.•*´` `*•.LOVE

16 months ago

nice.

16 months ago

nice post

16 months ago

Hello Naeem ....i think you were spamming...please stop it...before its too late

16 months ago

Emotion is something hard to keep in control. Good ones sometime make you restless and even hard to decide. One wrong moves really hurts sometime bystander. That what make you puzzle..............ohohohoh.....................Thanks for sharing. I shall say no more. You must read yourself and make your own understanding...................................CU

16 months ago

great one

16 months ago

great post so nice working

16 months ago

very nice post dear...

16 months ago

very good post.............

16 months ago

emotion is something

16 months ago

its great post

16 months ago

great post i like very much

16 months ago

I STRONGLY LIKE TO READ THIS

15 months ago

The emotions effects to the personalty so it must be positive and controlled.

15 months ago