Got Facebook or Twitter?Connect your FanBox to Facebook or Twitter & keep
your friends updated with all your activity on FanBox.
It's free and takes less than 10 seconds!
If I ever get around to boyfriend number two, he better have a busy life full of his own hobbies and goals, because I will not be someone's reason to exhale. I have better things to do then entertain a full grown man when I'm not getting paid for it. "
-- HBI Member, Gabriela
"Guys are obsessed with the anus. Do you think it's vagina envy?"
"Men have called me a man-hater, a feminazi, frigid, a bitch... but in my mind it always translates as "You don't need me to validate your existence, and that scares me." "
-- HBI member, KIM
"If you ever need an outfit to match that stick up your ass, give me a call."
-- Lenore Bernard, Fashion Consultant (From the HBO Series, Hung)
"...if you're not bleeding, vomiting, or on fire, chill out and stop crying."
-- Heartless Bitch Member, Stephanie
"Treating the whole world as if it works for you doesn't suggest you're special, it means you're an ass. "
-- Raina Kelley at Newsweek
"...this is exactly how Nice Guys operate, treating all encounters with women as a form of speed dating and then getting annoyed when it’s revealed that the woman getting coffee was, in fact, actually getting coffee rather than cruisin’ for an emotionally co-dependent shitstorm."
-- Richie at criticism.wordpress.com
"Another trip to Home Depot and Canadian Tire. I always get such a kick from the look on guys faces when you are in the tool section or near the fishing supplies. Well nothing beats the automotive section - they look at you like, "what are you doing here?" like you have invaded the tree fort."
"There's a reason it's called 'girls gone wild' and not 'women gone wild'. When girls go wild, they show their tits. When women go wild, they kill men and drown their kids in a tub."
-- Comedian, Louis C.K.
"The only thing I HAVE to do in this life is die. Everything else is a choice with consequences - including breathing."
-- HBI Member, Genie
"I once crocheted a pair of fuzzy purple balls and sent them to my friend's ex for Christmas; judging by his whiny complaints and incessant text-messaged Emo song lyrics sent after the fact, he was having trouble finding his own."
-- HBI Member, Kristin
"Yes, I'm pissed off and most people irritate me. But if people weren't so ignorant, self-absorbed, and down right stupid, I wouldn't be so Bitchy all the time."
-- HBI Member, Devon
"He's rude, controlling, abusive, misogynistic, disparaging and dismissive.... In all seriousness though, what a hideous lust object to mythologize. It'll be teaching all sorts of young girls that it's ROMANTIC to accept any sort of appalling treatment some brooding loser who treats you like dirt."
-- The Morrigan, (describing the romantic lead in "Twilight")
"...it's about writing a coherent application, not SAYING you're not beating around the bush when you are, in fact, grooming your own ornamental hedge."
-- -Fabulana, reviewing and rejecting a membership application
"If a bunch of guys are calling me a Bitch, I know I must be hitting a nerve, if they start calling me a Heartless Bitch, I know I've got them running scared, but the best part is when they call me a Cold, Heartless Bitch (my brother's personal favorite), because they know I am someone they will never be able to subjugate."
"In conclusion, I invite the media to all grow a pair. And if you can’t, I will lend you mine."
-- Amy Poehler as Hilary Clinton on Saturday Night Live
"Seriously, just how psychologically crippled do you have to be before shopping for shoes, the socks your husband left in the floor, coloring your hair, and what your neighbors think of you are the biggest things in your whole fucking world?"
-- HBI Member Hazel
"Being a Heartless Bitch isn't about stepping on other people, or reality TV-style sabotage antics. Its about working hard for what you want, and knowing when to stand up for what you deserve. Its not about demoralizing others; its about self-empowerment. Its not about being arrogant; its about displaying your confidence and intellect as a badge of pride. Its not asserting any inherent superiority or self-entitlement, but recognizing your own self-worth and value."
-- Kat D.
"I'll leave a sniveling girly-girl cowering with a glare, but a man? I've offered on several occasions to hold a guy's jockstrap while he tries to figure out where to stick the tampon I've just handed him. "
-- HBI Member Chris
"No, that dress doesn't make you seem fat...but your dependence on others' opinions definitely makes you seem shallow."
"The idea that one person could be all things to another person, satisfy every need or even more than one, is sentimental and mawkish."
-- Zack (from the TV show "Bones")
"You better put a condom on - if you're gonna act like a dick you need to dress like one."
-- HBI Member, Robin
"IF I cared, I'd draw you a map of your ass with an X marking the spot where your head is buried."
"Hell hath no fury like a Heartless Bitch forced to listen (yet again) to the sighs and moans of another human being complaining about how insurmountable their problems are when they should be out there actually doing something to solve them!"
-- HBI Member, Jules
"I do not have a gym membership, a husband, or a Vogue subscription. I've never been in Bloomingdale's. I refuse to talk on the phone and drive. I'm one of the happiest women I know."
-- HBI Member, Julia
"I believe education should be every woman's top priority, the sight of a man crying doesn't automatically reduce me to a melted puddle of compassionate weakness (no get out of jail free card here), and I have convictions from which I'll never back down."
-- HBI Member, Jillian
"An over-inflated ego wrapped in an undeserved sense of entitlement earns a first class ticket to the back of the queue."
-- HBI Member, Rachel
"I am a 911 dispatcher. I have heard real drama as it unfolds. Your piddly assed problem does not compare real tragedy. Here is a straw, suck it up and move along."
-- HBI Member, Inez
"When kicking the unworthy to the curb, kick correctly lest they bounce back to you."
"I believe in the ugly truth rather than the beautiful lie."
-- HBI Member, Cobiwan
"At this point, I don't think she's a heartless bitch; she's a bitter, angry bitch, and that's an energy-burner and, eventually, a soul-destroyer."
"If I had a dick I'd be applauded and called a real man. But I'm a female - so the world calls me a Bitch."
-- HBI Member Sarah
"Hun, your jerk boyfriend is like a bottle of sour milk in the fridge. You don't keep going back and tasting the milk to see if it's better; why do you think that if you give him enough chances, he'll magically become a nice guy?"
-- HBI Member Ann
"Don’t fuck with my reality. I’d rather know an ugly truth than be mislead by a pretty lie. Just lay it on out there, say what you mean and don’t paint the turds."
-- HBI Member MisTre
"The sexiest parts of my body? My brain, my spine, and my guts."
-- HBI Member, -Nadia
"I strongly object to the primeval notion that women should consider their college years as an opportunity to find a husband. Women, regardless of age, should have an intellectual curiosity that goes beyond wondering if their shoes match their purse."
-- HBI Member, Laura
"You know, having a vagina doesn't make it obligatory for you to breed... Have you considered abortion?"
-- HBI Member, Amber
"Women have been trained to speak softly and carry a lipstick. Those days are over."
-- Bella Abzug, politician
"It annoys me to see women and girls pretend they couldn't find the business end of a power drill/spatula if it was lodged in their brain stems. Girls, you are not useless. Deal with it."
-- HBI Member, Krystel
"I'm single; there are lots of single women in the world that have yet to spontaneously combust due to lack of the presence of a penis."
-- HBI Member, Danielle
"I see no reason why having a clit instead of a dick should bar me from knowing how to work on my car, throw a decent punch, or fish and hunt."
-- HBI Member, Sara
"I do get called a bitch quite often. What I do NOT get called is pushover, stupid, sweetheart, dear or doormat. Works for me."
-- Rebecca M.
"The trick is not how much pain you feel -but how much joy you feel. Any idiot can feel pain. Life is full of excuses to feel pain, excuses not to live, excuses, excuses, excuses."
-- Erica Jong
Audrey: Statistically speaking Law Enforcement attracts a certain kind of male personality.
Matt: And that is?
Matt: And the type of female it attracts?
Audrey: Bitches. We keep it in the canine family.
-- from the ABC TV Series "Heros"
"Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have the obligation to be one. You cannot make any useful contributions in life unless you do that."
"Take your life in your own hands and what happens? A terrible thing: no one to blame."
"I'm an Air Force officer just like you are, Colonel. And just because my reproductive organs are on the inside instead of the outside doesn't mean I can't handle whatever you can handle."
"Why this insane, vein-popping determination that it's impossible, IMPOSSIBLE that a female who actually has a life and two firing brain cells to rub together would POSSIBLY have anything pointedly critical to say about males?"
"I know the difference between being a Bitch (taking no unwarranted shit) and being an asshole (dishing out unwarranted shit)."
"I couldn't give a rat's tutu about your emotional distress"
"I've been pissed off by one too many immature, disorganized and emotionally spastic publicists to take any shit from an f'ing sweetdick BMW-owning engineer. The principle is: Put your balls in your pants and USE THEM."
"And oh, the painful attempts at wit. Clearly this guy thinks he's hot shit on a stick with rice. I do agree with the shit part, though, and I definitely have my suspicions about that stick."
"You do learn restraint, though. You can't give in to that motherly urge to smother 'em all in their sleep. In this business it would just mean more work for you the next day."
If he really WANTS to use his head as a butt-plug, maybe you should just, you know, LET him. Perhaps he has a fondness for using santorum as a hair-grooming product."
"The first idiotic quick fix of the summer that springs to mind is ABC's "How to Get the Guy" (10 p.m. Mondays) -- a show that would more accurately be called "How to Get A Guy, Any Guy" or better yet, "How to Cast a Great, Big, Wide Net Like the Soulless, Whoring Sea Donkey That You Are.""
"The victimization culture of today's psychology has done a great disservice to too many people. Somewhere along the way, therapists forgot to teach their patients that the 'right to have your feelings' does not mean the right to act like a raging asshole."
"This guy puts the "why?" in Y chromosome... bigtime."
"Having been fucked is no excuse for being fucked up."
"I cannot take any more; I'm so glad that I'll never fit in; That will never be me; Outcasts and girls with ambition; That's what I wanna see"
"Being a Heartless Bitch is never easy. What made you think choosing the path of self-determination was going to be the easy one? This is going to be painful for you. It isn't all spewing poisoned pen notes about your victimized past, sure THAT is easy. What's hard is building a life, and changing yourself. Not him. You. Have. To. Change."
No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. I have known mothers who remake the bed after their children do it because there's a wrinkle in the spread or the blanket is on crooked. This is sick.
"Warning: Frequent visits to HBI has been reported to make our male readers 15%-75% sexier... Forget viagra boys, just get a spine and that's all the erectile help you'll need."
"I'm starting to think it can't be Head-Up-Ass Syndrome, because there's got to be more oxygen and more light up even the flabbiest ass than could account for such rampant and long-lasting self-abnegation."
"The brain is connected to the spine. Try to get them working in tandem for a change."
"You know, I really DO hate boneheads, but bonehead WOMEN have a SPECIAL place in the crack of my ass."
"A real HB would do everything s/he can not to waste this lesson, because when the lesson is wasted, That Bitch Called Life will only use a bigger hammer next time around."
"Victimhood is not a costume donned to gain attention"
"Because, you know, there's one thing you don't want. It's a woman with her finger on the button who isn't getting laid."
"I'd rather be despised for my character than liked for my lack of it."
"Sometimes you have to learn how to open your mouth for more than just giving head."
"When a man gives his opinion, he's a man. When a woman gives her opinion, she's a bitch."
"I am 'too fiery'... yet I wish to be seen as I am and I would lose all rather than soften away anything."
"I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life's a bitch. You've got to go out and kick ass."
"All alike, you men. You only want the satisfaction of being through with us first, that's all. So far I've had the good fortune of beating you to it. So I am heartless."
"People think at the end of the day that a man is the only answer [to fulfillment]. Actually a job is better for me."
"If you think you are too small to have an impact, try going to bed with a mosquito"
"What worries me the most is that most men are so weak. Because of that they act like they don't care and like machos - because they are too fragile inside. They're scared of confrontation and afraid of so many things."
Contents of this blog
Earn by linking to this post. (How?)
You are now following this blog.
Adult content and certain language are not permitted in premium blog posts.
Why? In order to fulfill our objective of helping you earn money, we have to abide by mobile carrier regulations.
In order to publish this post, please remove all offensive language and adult references, by modifying any yellow highlighted text. We apologize if our automated system flagged something it really shouldn’t have.