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Pathan: Bhai sahab 1 kala bulb dena.
Storekeeper: Aap kaley bulb ka kia karainge?
Pathan: Dopaher me soney k liye andhera karna hai
A boy 2 pathan: Mai agar chahon to tamam Pathano ko Jannat se nikal kar Jahanum main la sakta hoon.
Boy: Main Jahanum mai Naswar ka dukan kholon ga.
Sardar: Aao Race Lagatay hain, Jo haara woh ek hazaar rupay dega.
Pathan: Lekin Mujhe Rasta nahi Maloom.
Sardar: Bus Tum meray peechay peechay aatay rehna.
Pathan: Thanks Yara...
As the airliner was preparing to land in Madrid in a rainstorm, an English passenger seemed noticeably afraid. "What's the problem, fellow?" asked his seat mate.
"Surely," said the Englishman, "you've heard the saying, 'The planes in Spain fall mainly in the rains!!'"
A drunken man gets on the bus late one night, staggers up the aisle, and sits next to an elderly woman.
She looks the man up and down and says, "I've got news for you. You're going straight to hell!"
The man jumps up out of his seat and shouts, "Man, I'm on the wrong bus!"
EK DOST DUSRE DOST SE APANI PATNI KI DHOKHE BAJI KE BARE ME BATATE HUE BOLA- ” MAI KUCH DINO KE LIYE BAHAR GAYA THA - AUR JAB MAI GHAR AAYA TO MAINE APNI PATNI KO APNE HI DOST KE SATH BADROOM ME DEKHA,
JABKI MAINE USE APNE LAUTNE KA SMS BHI BHEJA THA, TUM HI BATAO, ISE KYA KAHENGE?”
DUSRA DOST BOLA- “YAHI KI SHAYAD USE TUMHARA SMS NAHI MILA.”
Maalik: Tum bathroom mein kyu ghus aaye, Kya tumhe pata nahi tha ki mein naha raha hoon?
Naukar: Hazur galti ho gayi, mein samjha tha begum sahiba hai.
Munna : Abay Circuit! Jaa baajo walay ghar say Doctor ko bula k laa, meri tabiat kharab ho reli hai.
Circuit : Aey Bhai!!! aap to khud doctor ho.
Munna : Bolay to meri fees bahut zyada hai.
Bania’s son: Daddy meri door ki nazar kharab hai SPECKS banwa do.
Kanjoos Bania took him outside & said: Woh dekh kya hai?
Kanjoos Bania: Abbe ullu ke patthe, aur kitni dur tak dekhna chahe hai tu.
An eldely Jewish couple on their way to a vacation in Hawaii, got into an argument about the correct pronunciation of Hawaii.
He was sure it was Havaii, but she maintains that it was Hawaii.
As soon as they landed they asked the first person they saw, "Would you mind telling me the name of this island?"
"Havaii!", the man replied.
"Thanks", answered the man.
"You're Velcome," the man replied.
"Do you really believe your husband when he tells you he goes fishing every weekend?" asked Jane's best friend. "Why shouldn't I?" said Jane. "Well, maybe he is having an affair?" "No way" said Jane "he never returns with any fish..."
"The car won't start," aid a wife to her husband. "I think there's water in the carburettor."
"How do you know?" said the husband scornfully. "You don't even know what the carburettor is."
"I'm telling you," repeated the wife, "I'm sure there's water in the carburettor."
"We'll see," mocked the husband. "Let me check it out. Where's the car?"
"In the swimming pool."
My wife and I were watching some TV show the other nite where the wife hired a private detective to follow her husband and see if he were infact "cheating" on her. I asked my wife if she would ever do that. She said, "Well not so much to find out who the other woman was, but to see if I could find out what she saw in ya."
An old man and woman hate each other, but remain married for years. During their shouting fights, the old man constantly warns his wife, "If I die first, I will dig my way up and out of the grave to come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!"
One day, the man abruptly dies. After the burial, the wife goes straight to the local bar and begins to party. Her friends ask if she isn't worried about her husband digging himself out of the grave.
The wife smiles, "Let the old bugger dig. I had him buried upside down!"
There was a couple who had been married for a long time, and one day, they were walking through the park together, when they saw a young couple sitting on a bench, kissing each other very passionately. So the wife said to the husband, "Honey, why don't you do that?" And the husband said, "How? I don't even know that lady!"
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