The Future for use

This article describes techniques and tactics that you can use to defend yourself against adult bullying, whether it be in the workplace or in your personal life.

There has been a lot of news coverage and discussion about bullying among children. The growth of social media has drawn attention to the way that children pick on other children, which can lead to tragic results including permanent damage to self esteem, eating disorders, and even suicide. However, not as much attention has been devoted to an equally real and dangerous social problem: Adult Bullying.

The fact is that people who were bullies as children often continue to be bullies as adults. Sadly, many of the techniques that they learned as child bullies work for them as adults, and they use these techniques to dominate and abuse fellow adults, be it in their workplace, their family or their social circle. It is a sad fact of life that bullies are often perceived as alpha males or females, or as having leadership qualities, so that many people in positions of authority such as large workplaces tend to be bullies, which gives them expanded opportunities to bully others, using their authority to guarantee that the victim is or at least feels powerless to do anything about it.

What can you do to protect yourself if you are the victim of adult bullying?

Before discussing what one can do about bullying it is important to understand what bullying is, as well as the different types and forms that it can take since the strategy that may be most appropriate will depend on the type of harassment that you are experiencing. It is also good idea to know your enemy: not all bullies are the same and their motivations differ. So you will have to adapt your defensive strategy to the situation and the specific bully.

An adult bully is a person who persistently uses intimidation, offensive conduct, or insulting behaviour to humiliate, belittle or get his way. The key to this definition is that the behaviour must be persistent. Isolated incidents of inappropriate behaviour do not make a person a bully; we have probably all been guilty of some wrongful actions at some point in our lives. But when these acts form part of the person's regular repertoire of behaviours, and come define his or her personality, then you are dealing with an adult bully.

The term bullying is often used too broadly. Bullying is not an isolated incident or even incidents of rudeness, especially if the situation provoked the behaviour. Anyone can have a bad day, and being rude or even calling someone a name does not make someone a bully. It may not be right, but it is not bullying.