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* Arlene * helps shelters for abused women and children.

Did you just flip off your wife and then justify your behavior?  Or scream at your husband in frustration (and then refuse to apologize)?  Do you often find yourself justifying behaviors towards your spouse that you would be embarrassed to use with your friends?

In their actions, at least, struggling couples often lose track of the very basics of what makes a good relationship.

Your partner (like all humans) has vulnerabilities and sensitivities that have their origins in the family he or she grew up in, as well as in painful events that occurred in the world outside the home.

 

First, is it okay to sexually fantasize about others? Second, is it okay to sexually fantasize about others while you are having sex with your partner?

 

Spending time or effort to look after their appearance is, understandably, not at the top of their to-do list. And, like many couples, they are counting on their strong emotional bond to keep things running smoothly. Maintaining a vital and satisfying relationship is important to them and, in the end, it's what makes their efforts all worthwhile. They believe that everything else can wait.

But a recent Harris Interactive  survey commissioned by Medicis Aesthetics  tells us that the connection between caring for our physical appearance and the health of romantic relationships is actually stronger than we realize.

In a recent post I explored

In a recent post I explored the hot, new marriage-wrecking trend of finding ex-loves on Facebook and rekindling old flames. It's seductive on so many levels. The social networking site allows you to create your public image with only your best, well-lit pictures and your wittiest, grammatically correct posts. People find each other and despite a 20, 30, or 40-year span, time stops and there you both are, in the heat and hormones of high school prom night, like not one second has gone by.

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